And it started.

Welcome to my humble and hushed metropolis; the city where I am the king, the author and the life of the party. The world where I hide when in distressed, rejoice when glad and cry when in pain.

This historical fortress; a stronghold of wishes and dreams has witnessed my unending combat against the monsters in my closet and the ghosts under my bed. Has seen my struggles, my heartaches and even my endless wonders.

Discovering myself was the primary objective of building this realm. I wanted to experience the adventure of seeking words that together would interpret the language of my heart.

Call me 'emo' or whatever name that pleases you I don't care. I'm just glad I'm not like you, a trembling coward who's afraid to face his/her own feelings.


Monday, August 24, 2009

A letter of longing

To that someone who will never be replaced,

I sat beneath the star-spangled sky watching you. You're laughing with your friends, cracking silly jokes with joy written all over your face. You're happy indeed and indeed you've missed them.
It's been a long time since you have left. I missed your laughter, those eyes of yours that held all the beauty in the world and our moments, such memories filled with endless wonder. We could have died of happiness, or at least I could have.

Now you're back. Truly my prayers have been answered, that those long cold nights of crying were not in vain. It's sad though, how you forgot about me, how you ignored my presence, how I had to steal glimpses of you, how I sit here, here under this thick, moonless, black canvass craving for your attention.

I guess I have no more room in your heart. I guess all the roles in your little theater show have already been taken, that happiness is only a state of mind, a phony dream, a trap of wonderful promises. Still, I'll leave a space for you in my heart, in case you'll need me, in case you'll return.

27 meaningful voices:

PinkNote said...

I do hope she will come back in your arms..=)

Aris said...

true love waits. and even if it takes forever, true love remains. :)

ELAY said...

PINKNOTE: Actually he's a HE

KUYA ARIS: I guess so... pero, to tell you the truth I ain't hoping anymore

jhannadavid said...

for whom were you addressing this letter of longing?!?..the time i read this..i feel such discomfort and pain..it's sad to hear those hearted words that dresses pains and sorrows..amf!

♥superjaid♥ said...

cheer up..time will come mahahanap mo rin ang taong para sayo..

ordinary_guy1234 said...

naasar ako sa comp shop na toh. lahat in slow motion, ultimo pag galaw ng mouse kakaasar. pati internet nmen sa bahay. bwiset din ung globe. hahaha nag labasa daw ba ng sama ng loob.

well anyways, pareng elay. sabi nga nila there's still a lot of fish in the sea. oh dba. madami p jan. nice post bro.

jhannadavid said...

whom are you pertaining to..?!?
is he/she so special for you to dedicate that hearted words of pain and sorrows..?
i guess so, that's why you've made it right?hehe
amf!
don't worry..there is a right time that you'll gonna meet that person again...just wait..

ACRYLIQUE said...

:( That made me even more sadder.
Sigh.
We just broke up.

ELAY said...

ORDINARY GUY: oo nga, you're right there are lots of fish in the sea. Pero aanhin mo un kung isa lang ang kailangan mo diba? haaay

JHANNA: hmmm.. my... my... long lost friend. *sighs. alam mo there are so many people out there making friends with me pero ewan parang ayoko na.

ACRYLIQUE: Ganun ba.. sorry kuya haay kaya pala mga posts mo sa blog mo puro murder.

chikletz said...

ang depressing naman nito.. hayyy..

ordinary_guy1234 said...

you'd probably learn how to let go eventually. ganyan nmn lahat eh.

lucas said...

hays... nakakalungkot naman. people leave and sometimes they come back... but not really. they're just there inflicting pain from withered scars of the past, searing to the present.

MOMMY DHARLZ said...

yeah, i agree--- LOVE... hmmm.. kahit masakit na, LOVE pa rin.. kasi masarap magmahal..

vheeny said...

ohh sad

this one's really a sad message

i really hope you'll find a way to gain back yer friend.
if not,gain back the happiness in you

godbless...

ELAY said...

CHIKLETZ: Haaaay, sulat pa lang yan imaginin mo ung pakiramdam

KUYA LUCAS: OO at naalala ko ung post mo na isa sa mga pinaka favorite ko, ung RED LIGHT.

MOMMY D: opo... haaay kahit masakit pero I guess ganun tlga kasi ganun rin naman si Jesus kahit nasasaktan xa satin patuloy parin xa sa pag love

VHEENY: I stopped hoping that my friend will come back na, ang pinagppray ko na lang eh maging happy xa at bumalik ng tuluyan kay God.

Becs said...

nakakadepress naman. :|

ELAY said...

BECS: sulat pa lang nakakadepress na, imaginin mo ung naramdaman ko nun. yees

Mang Paul said...

ayos lang 'yan!...

ganun talaga...may mga nawawala at may dumadating din nman..

who knows di ba?...just hope and pray na kahit hindi xa bumalik seu, at least maging ok xa at makakilala rin kay Lord!

ELAY said...

MANG PAUL: Grabe, yun na yun ang nasa isip ko. Hindi ko man hinihiling na bumalik ung closeness namin I'm praying to God na he will reveal himself to my friend and pagpalain xa.

lucas said...

yeah... i remember the inspiration when i decided to write the red light post. people leave but sometimes it's good... there's a reason for everything and i believe that.

---

yeah... it's not surprising that we get connected to what we write. i mean it's our thought and our feelings that forged the words to make them... thanks :)

vheeny said...

well

i had experienced the same thing den

but the diff is

he is with GOD now

elYAS said...

this is melancholic. i feel for you.

teka, di ko alam kung bakit ko ginoogle ang name ko at lumabas ang blog mo. haha. galing!

babalik ako dito upang magbasa. sa tamang panahon.

ELAY said...

LUCAS: woooo "forged" grabe hahahaha parang swords lang

VHEENY: He's with God? what do you mean? dedbols na?

ELYAS: tadhana ang nagdala sayo dito kapatid.

Darwin^^ said...

elay, san ka kumukuha ng layout ng blog? thanks! :)

ELAY said...

DARWIN: ay wala, actually ako lang gumagawa nian. ginagawa kong color black ung page color tapos inaalis ko boarders ayun.

Mahesh Sindbandge said...

Hey Hi,

I am new to your blog...

stumbled to here from various blogs...

Frankly speaking, i still cant believe that a 17 year old "kid" ( read Soul) can write with so much of depth...

Glad i came here

Keep penning :)

Cheers

elYAS said...

my real name is elias jayson. nyahaha. nakakatuwa. english form ng name ko pangalan mo. kwak kwak.

i will tag this. para makapagbasa ng new posts. :D

addio!